Sunday, November 18, 2012

16 ways i blew up my marriage - NOT

happen to chance upon this blog that went viral on facebook last week. reminded me of a post i did 2 years ago titled ABCs of marriage ... =)  

so using it as a check-list to assess my own marriage life... just for fun though..... 

(1) Don't stop holding hands
i agree... the moment these little intimacy such as holding hands, goodnight kisses, goodbye hugs and snuggles are stopped, the love between a couple will eventually become more to the responsibility kind, more to the family kind which i dun wan.....i want the lovey dovey kind, i wan the bf/gf kind, i want the honeymoon period kind of marriage.... =P 


(2) Don't stop trying to be attractive
mr ang is an exercise freak and up till now, still works very hard to keep himself fit which is to my delight cos i love 痩痩高高 kind of guys.... though he's abit too fit for my liking, but i can make do with the muscles and the 6 pac de..... wahahaha....  

on the other hand, i do dress up for him occasionally too. I do enjoy dolling myself with make-up and pretty dresses once in while when i am super free... =) 


(3) Don't always point out each other's weaknesses
positive reinforcement works much better, even for adults.... a big thanks to my job, i'm a good praiser.... hahahaha.... 

on the other hand, mr ang is very good at sugar coating his words when he points out my weaknesses... 
eg:

  • Dear dear, you are getting flabbier leh.... but i like.... nicer to hug.... 
  • Dear dear, you very nua leh.... but i like.... means i got more free time to go gym and to do exercise


(4) Don't stop cooking for eachother
this rule doesn't really apply to us.... dun think campbell soup, maggi mee or jelly count as cooking right???? in that case, i can 'proudly' announce that i have never cook a proper meal for him before.... >.<.... but neither has he for me.... wahahaha.... cos i always help out in his attempt to cook spaghetti or breakfast for me..... so ended up as a cook together session and even so i can count the number of times we cook together with the fingers on one hand lo... 

the image of a messy & oily kitchen and the thought of  having to mop the floor and to wash a whole sink of oily plates and pots really put us off.... we rather spend the effort and time to doll ourselves up and go out and have a good meal.... heee


(5) Don't yell at each other
this rule doesn't really apply to us too.... cos i think our house is too small to have to yell to get each other's attention lo. In addition, we also do not yell at each other when we are unhappy with each other too... the change in tone is 难免的 though


(6) Don't call names
unless they can be cute-ti-fied.... i used to be called 趴趴熊 due to my habit of  趴趴-ing on the sofa or bed to do my work.... and now i am upgraded to a hippopotamus because i m getting flabbier... mr ang says i remind him of this game


maybe is the way he says it, i dun find it offensive at all....heee 


(7) Don't be stingy with your money
our solution to this is.... to be a dual income family where he spend his own money, i spend my own money, we dun have to feel heartache over how each other spend our own money.... currently, he's in-charge of the groceries while i'm in charge of the bills, which amount to only approx $200 a month.... i'm so looking forward to next july though.... mr ang will be taking over all the bills once he starts receiving his allowance for his phd program... which means i can be a complete leech.....i am so gonna 白吃白住 from then on....  yippy ya yo to more money for shopping.... wahahaha.... 


(8) Don't argue in front of the kids
i know this will definitely be the rule if we have kids in future. 


(9) Don't encourage each other to skip working out
oopx.... i'm always asking him to skip his run, to skip his gym cos i really think he's exercising too much.... mr ang runs at least twice a week, swim once a week, gym once a week, plays badminton once a week and not forgetting the floor mat exercises twice a week while he watches EPL.... he does all these even when he's not feeling very well and also during his exam period lo.... 

on the other hand, he dosen encourage me to skip my work out at all cos i dun even work out.... wahahaha.... =P.... 

actually, mr ang has been encouraging me to sign up for dance/aerobics classes at hougang sport hall though.... but to attend class alone is so boring leh... so mr ang threw in the deal... he accompanies me to class, i attend class while he goes to the gym then he will accompany me home.... still considering, cos i'm sure he wun have the time to accompany me for all lessons.... 


(10) Don't poop with the bathroom door open.... 
I shall keep my mouth shut on this.... wahahaha....


(11) Don't stop kissing each other
That's why i insist on having morning kiss, goodnight kiss, goodbye kiss and most importantly, my princess kiss.... even when i'm still sleeping like a pig every morning, i make it a point that he must still kiss me goodbye before he goes to school though it can be quite irritating to be woken up on some mornings.... but i'm not complaining.... =P 


(12) Don't stop having fun together
it's always fun hanging out with mr ang even at home.... he's like my personal entertainer la.... super comical, super talkative, super animated... =D


(13) Don't pressure each other
i strongly believe that no two ppl are identical.... i strongly believe that two people who are brought up in two different families will definitely react to things and events differently....so try not to pressurise each other to change.... the only thing i ever wanted mr ang to change was to curb his temper which i think he's doing a fantastic job at it.... =) 


(14) Don't label each other with negative labels
Positive reinforcement & lots of praises is really the key to stay happy together .... so i'm gonna declare: mr ang is so GOOD at doing housework.... he's doing it MUCH MUCH better than me.... give him a BIG ROUND OF APPLAUSE....... he feels good and appreciated for doing it then he will do more right???? .... my logic.... wahahaha..... 


(15) Don't skip out on things that are impt to each other
i join him to watch EPL, know most of the names of the players.... stop stressing him to sleep early and to spend less time on his books while he understands that i need alot of sleep and that i need lots of hugs & kisses


(16) Don't emotionally distance after a fight
I'm guilty of this cos i will always dun wanna talk if unhappiness arises...i always wanna just sleep it away....but thankfully, i have a mr ang who will talk and force me to talk everything out.... so our unhappiness will never ever last more than an hour.... =) 


our marriage is so far still so great.... really hope we can stay this loving, this appreciative, this understanding, this accepting in all the years to come.... =) ...kambate!!!!

No comments: